Hobbies
by Joanna Davis
Summary: We'll take a look on what the Naruto characters do in their spare time. We have here all kinds of characters, so just enter the world you'd have never thought of...
1. Shizune

Hobbies

**I decided I needed a little laugh, so I made a series of stories about**** the Naruto characters' hobbies, observed by Tenten.**

**Made just for fun, don't take it seriously.**

**Shizune**

"Hey, Shizune-sama... Can I look at what you're doing today?"

"Sure, Tenten!"

Shizune walked full speed to the Hokage's office, with Tenten tailing behind her.

"Come on, Tsunade-sama, you have a wonderful hair! I want to make it prettier!"

"No!"

"Ooooh, pleeeeease!"

"No!"

"Pleeeeaseeee!"

"…fine…"

"Yayayayay! Come, to the hairstyling room!" Shizure happily yelled and started dragging Tsunade and Tenten through the building. Why she agreed… even she didn't know. All she knew was that in the next hour her assistant's hands will be messing her hair.

Tsunade had never entered that room before, and she thought she knew the Hokage building by heart. The room was full of hair brushes, some so big that a horse could be groomed with them, different recipients full of hair foam, balm and other incredible tools.

Shizune made the Fifth sit down in the chair, and begun untying her hair. After a long hair brushing the assistant started working with some hair elastics.

In less than a few minutes Tsunade had two schoolgirl pigtails on each side of her head. She looked resigned as Shizune undone them and started working at a very complicate hairstyle, sticking her tongue out in concentration.

Only 50 more minutes to go…

**After that, Shizune lets Tsunade go and goes after Sakura:**

"Oh, come on, Sakura-chan! Just one hairstyle! Ino-chan will be very jealous on you when she'll see your new look! Every guy in Konoha will love you!"

"I don't know, Shikune-sama…"

"Oh, but even Tsunade-sama let me do her hairstyle!"

"Fine…"

"Yayayayayayay!" and Sakura was dragged in the same _torture room_. "So, do you die your hair?"

"What? No!"

"I see… It's no shame, really… I mean if your natural color was pink then the hair on your arms should be pink too. It isn't!" Shizune declared looking at one of Sakura's arms.

"… can't you see my eyebrows are pink too?"

"Yeah… Well, I think we can dye that pink hair… What about some red bangs?"

"Will it look good?"

"Oh, of course! It'll match your shinobi outfit!"

"Alright, if you say so…"

An evil grin was plastered on Shizune's face. Sakura had no idea what she could do with some hair dye…

**This is it, short and I guess funny. I didn't really have ideas, so if you have any let me know.**


	2. Lee & Gai The Power of Youth!

Hobbies

**Dunno if I'll be able to update sooner than two weeks later, because I'm going on a holiday and I won't have internet. **

**I'm working on another story in the same time, so I can't know how often I'll be able to update everything.**

**I don't own Naruto.**

**2. Lee and Gai**

Tenten was never too curious about what her sensei and her weird teammate were doing in their spare time. Probably they were babbling about youth and stuff, then yell 'Lee!' 'Gai-sensei!' 'Lee!' 'Gai-sensei!' and run hug each other and the sunset would come out of nowhere and the cliff that appeared out of nowhere too would be bathed in the sunlight… Full of youth… Yuck.

But considering Lee begged her to bring Sakura at one of the shows he and his sensei were performing, she had to hold her promise. (Not that she cared about LeeSaku very much, but she cared about the NejiTen date Lee told her she could get.)

"Come, Sakura-chan, I'm sure it's going to be fun… Plus many people will see your new… look…" Tenten smirked, looking again at Sakura's multicoloured head. 'Probably Lee will drop on spot his youth theory when he'll see her.' she thought.

They entered something that looked like a theatre with a big stage with big curtains and many seats. They took the ones in the front, seeing not many people wanted to see the show.

Suddenly, light went off except for a spotlight on the stage. Gai-sensei came from out of nowhere, making a very dramatic entry. Near him was Lee that looked like a puppet.

"Welcome to the youthful show of ventriloquism! Today we'll be talking about… *dramatic drums* YOUTH!"

Tenten sweat dropped, but Sakura seemed slightly interested. Probably because, unlike Tenten, she didn't hear it every year, season, month, week, day, hour, minute, second, millisecond and whatever time measures would exist.

"For example, Lee, look in the public and tell me what catches your youthful eye!"

"It's that youthful beautiful girl in the first row!"

Sakura felt very happy and flattered, but Lee ruined her happiness: "The flower of our youthful team that keeps her promises everytime!"

Tenten could feel her face getting hot as the few people in the theatre stood up to see who Lee was talking about. Sakura was giving her hateful glares, but she kept watching the show.

"So youthful… like you Lee!" Gai-sensei said.

"GAI-SENSEI!"

"LEE!"

"GAI-SENSEI!''

"LEE!"

"GAI-SENSEI!"

"LEE!"

"GAI-SENSEI!''

"LEE!"

"GAI-SENSEI!"

"SHANNARO!"

Tenten gasped in shock as Sakura, mad and pissed off, used her superhuman strength to crack the floor under Gai-sensei and Lee's feet. They flew through the air Rocket-team style, yelling "This is the full power of youth!" and a star shined, though it was midday.

Everyone who was there came to Sakura, stared a little at her weird hair, but then shrugged and carried her on their shoulders out of the theatre.

Tenten, left alone, sighed and murmured something like 'To hell with the power of youth, I'll go to someone more normal…' and left.

**Whatcha think? I don't think I'll make the chappies of the same length, dunno… So, rate and review, this'll make me feel happy…**


	3. Shikamaru

Hobbies

**This is some sort of a bonus chappy... Short, I know, meant to be this ****way…**

**3. Shikamaru**

Tenten was still mentally scared after the last peek at someone's hobby, so she decided to look at someone who wasn't bound to have a colorful or youthful hobby.

"Hey, Shikamaru! What are ya' doing?"

"Sleeping."

"A-alright…"

"By the way, were those weirdos flying through the air Lee And Gai-sensei?"

"Yup…"

"Must be troublesome to be in the same team with them… Dunno how you and Neji stand them…"

"We have eachother…" Tenten sighed dreamily, thinking about how she and Neji gossiped about Lee and their sensei and how close he was to her in those time… Mentally she shook herself out of the daydreaming state and looked at Shikamaru as his eyes were following the clouds moving lazily on the sky.

"So what are you doing daily in your spare time?"

"Sleep?"

"And after that?"

"Sleep more?"

"And _after _that?"

"Look at the clouds?"

"And that's all?"

"Yeah…"

"Okayyyyy…"


	4. Sasuke

Hobbies

**I don't own Naruto, I only own the song I created on the spot! And this pillow being squashed under my laptop! Buahahahahaha! DIE PILLOW DIE! Sorry, where were we?**

**Ah, yeah! So... Sasuke didn't desert Konoha yet! He'll desert it the second Tenten leaves his house! **

**4. Sasuke**

Tenten left Shikamaru's roof halfheartedly. She didn't expect no hobby at all from Shikamaru… if watching the clouds doesn't count. She needed to see something unexpected… Like what was the perfect hot-but-not-hotter-than-Neji student Sasuke doing in his spare time.

Tenten arrived at his house and listened to the rock music coming from inside the house, loud and brain-scratching…

"I'm an avenger, I need to kill my brother!

I'm an avenger, I need to desert my village!

I'm an avenger, I need to go to a creepy pedo!

I'm an avenger, I need to kill my brother!" Sasuke sung in a completely false tone, in complete chaos with the rhythm of the melody he was playing on the guitar.

"He told me I was foooooolish, he told me next time

He killed everyone, he killed my soul

He told me he did it for the lulz, I believed him…

And yet I loved him hating him…

My brother killed everyone…

And I'm an avenger…" and the chorus started once again. Tenten was stunned. Not only she had no idea what he was singing/ yelling/ making noises of a cat that has been stomped over about, but her head was spinning because of the complete lack of melody in his song. It was like he_ tried _to sing the worst he could.

"And now I see someone is sitting in front of the door

Could it be Itachi, could it be Naruto,

Could it be my dead father?

Could it be…" she heard him sing, and then the door opened and Sasuke looked astonished at the girl. "…Tenten?"

"Um…hi?"

"What are you doing here?" he looked more than a little scared she could have found about his hobby.

"I was looking for you, silly! What other reason would I have to come at your door?"

"Now you found me. What do you want?"

"Can I borrow a little that guitar?"

"Ummm…" he started, but she took out a dangerous looking morning-star. "Sure!"

"Oooh, thanks! Now… do I remember the tune…?"

She tried a few cords, then her face lightened up and she begun to sing in the same false voice as Sasuke:

"I'm an avenger, though I have no idea what it means!

I'm an avenger, I'm going to ask Sakura marry me

I'm an avenger, and I have false cool attitude

I'm an avenger, and I want to dress in Lee's suit!"

Sasuke looked stunned at her as she handed him his guitar back.

"What? I didn't know the verses so I adapted it. I thought that was what you'd say!"

"…really?" he asked, in a dangerous tone.

"… I think I'll go now! The power of youth!" Tenten screamed and begun running out of the building.

She heard Sasuke scream like a schoolgirl "Chidori!" behind her, and half of the building exploded. Huh, the Hokage wasn't going to happy.

**So, are my songwriting skills incredible of what?**

**Rate and review!**


	5. Shino

Hobbies

**This one is random as hell! **

**PS: Made up Shino's mum, dunno how she looks, on Narutopedia they don't mention it!**

**I don't own Naruto blahblah... And the pillow is still mine! Diediediedie!**

**5. Shino**

As Sasuke was deserting the village and Sasuke fans all over the world were commiting suicide, Tenten walked to the Aburame mansion, careful not to step on a bug... or a hundred bugs that would later eat her alive... She shook the image out of her head, trying to ignore the screams from all the Sasuke fangirls around her.

She knocked a few times. Shino's mum answered the door. She looked like all of the Aburame clan members- wearing sunglasses everywhere and dressed in a coat that covered her from neck to knees and underneath a skirt that covered her down to her ankles.

"A friend of Shino's right? I'll call him right away…" she said, her voice remaining emotionless. "SHINOOOOOO!"

"What."

"A friend from school!"

"No."

"Don't be impolite!" she yelled back, as emotionless as she was all the time. "This means you can go to his room. The last room on the left."

"Uh… thanks?"

Tenten walked along the corridor and peeked through the cracked door. Shino was working on some sheets that were laying on the ground.

She knocked before entering. He didn't even turn around to see who was there, probably thinking it was either his mother or the friend from school.

"What are you working on?"

"Fashion."

Tenten thought she didn't hear him right. "What?"

"Fashion. The new collection. I call it FaShino!"

"FaShino?"

"Yup."

Did Shino just use the word 'yup'? He, the most stoic person in the universe? Use a slang? Not likely.

"Can I see it?"

"Sure."

Tenten was handed a file full of Shino's drawings. Some of them were good, but the bug costumes were creepy. Creepier that Sasuke's singing. She shuddered at the thought of that baka's song.

"What do you think?"

"Ummm… better than Sasuke's songs?"

"…"

"So this is what you do in your spare time?"

"Yes." Ah, better! The straight 'yes'!

"Okay… how many people know about it?"

"Only me, you and Hinata. She helped me create those." he said and showed her the most normal looking of the sketches. 'Figures…' Tenten thought.

"So are you looking forward to making a career out of this?"

"I actually thought once to give up being a ninja and dedicate my whole life to fashion… What do you think?"

"Um… I just realized I have to be somewhere else by now! See ya!" said the girl and rushed out of the building.

**Told ya, random like hell!**

**Review…!**


	6. Kankuru, Temari, Gaara& Kakuzu ?

Hobbies

**This is a chappy that includes many people, and in the next chappy Tenten will meet again her old friend (Dun dun duunn!) who'll give her a few days in the Akatsuki headquarter to take a look at the Akatsuki members' hobbies. If you want me to do a character, no matter how insignificant to the whole plot he/she is, I'll do it.**

**I don't own Naruto.**

**6. Gaara, Temari, Kankuru and Kakuzu(?)**

"Okay, you traveled all the way from Suna for what?" was Tenten's greeting for the Sand Siblings when they arrived in Konoha.

"We have our reasons." Temari said, way too bluntly for her. Tenten also noticed she and Kankuru weren't carrying the normal weapons they usually carried, instead they were carrying some huge musical instruments.

"Could you point us to the local theatre?" Kankuru asked.

"Ummmm… I don't know if they fixed the stage from the last… performance, but I think I can take you there." They walked to the theatre where the stage has been repaired, and Tenten left the four go to the backstage.

In a few minutes the room was filled with people, and the lights went off. First, Kankuru came out, wearing a suit, and stood down on the pianist's place. He started playing The Nutcracker, and then Temari came out with a violin and a short dress and stood down on a chair and started playing along with her brother. Tenten was watching, without much of a surprise plastered on her face. Then her mouth hang down a few meters when Gaara and a man full of stitches came in a ballerina costume and begun to dance.

They kept dancing for a while until the stitched man fell and ripped off Gaara's tutu, leaving him in his underwear. Everyone started laughing with tears, and the annoyed Kazekage took a fist full of decorative sand and threw it to the man.

"I fought the first Hokage!" Kakuzu yelled, and took out one of his hearts and threw it in Gaara's face. Gaara threw it to Temari, who threw it to Kankuru, who threw it inside the piano. Both Kakuzu and Kankuru jumped inside the piano after the heart, while Gaara was throwing sand in the viewers.

Some sand got in Naruto's eyes, who jumped up and down with a Rasengan in his hand yelling 'Where is Sas'ke, 'tebayo!' and kicking everyone around. Sakura was trying to make Naruto stop, but Hinata started hitting her chakra points without any reason. Neji was trying to stop his cousin, Tenten was trying to stop Neji and drag him out, Lee and Gai-sensei were doing mostly what they did most of the chapter two, Kiba and Akamaru were practicing their Gatsuuga everywhere around, Kakashi was reading his book, Kurenai and Asuma had left to make out somewhere, Shino was thinking about bug #762 and her baby bugs, Ino was helping Hinata beat the hell out of Sakura, yelling something about Sasuke, and… in a corner someone was humming the rhythm of 'I'm an avenger.'

Tenten quit trying to pull away Neji and went to the corner where that person stood. Only his Akatsuki cloak was visible. She approached and greeted him warmly:

"Long time no see, Itachi-sama…"

**This is it. **

**Any thoughts?**


	7. Itachi

Hobbies

**Whoah, many reviews! Cool! **

**I don't own Naruto.**

**7. Itachi**

_Tenten quit trying to pull away Neji and went to the corner where that person stood. Only his Akatsuki cloak was visible. She approached and greeted him warmly:_

"_Long time no see, Itachi-sama…"_

"Hello there, Tenten."

"You heard about Sasuke-kun, right?"

"Hm." Itachi said and walked out towards the main gates of Konoha.

**A long walk later, in the Akatsuki headquarter:**

"You won't tell anyone about the whereabouts of here, right?"

"Nah… what interest would I have to tell this?"

"Just checking. Anyways, the Leader will erase your memory about this place. He'll leave there only what you were interested in."

"The hobbies."

"The hobbies." Itachi agreed.

They walked to the kitchen, which was empty. Itachi got two sandwiches, threw one to Tenten who caught it in midair and sat down and both of them ate in silence.

"Sasuke doesn't understand…" Tenten heard. She looked around but only saw Itachi eating his sandwich in complete silence with his blank stare.

"He will forgive me…" Again, she looked around very puzzled.

"He'll understand… I killed them for the sake of Konoha…" Only then Tenten realized Itachi was talking with himself about Sasuke, but he didn't seem to know it. She didn't know many things about what really happened except for a few gossips she caught from others, so she listened carefully at what Itachi was murmuring.

For a while, he didn't say anything, instead looked at a red wall. Then he started again. "It was a red moon that night… and his blood fell too… The blood from his tears… The blood he'll never forget from my Tsukuyomi. But I had to do this… he'll forgive me… yes he will… he will… he will…"

'Okayyyyy…' thought Tenten totally amazed and surprised by this baby side of Itachi. He was thinking loud, something no one would ever think the great Itachi Uchiha, the murderer of the whole Uchiha clan, would do.

"And Sasuke was so cute when he was a small kiddie… now he grew up… and he wants to kill me… but I'll let him kill me just to make his wish come true… he grew strong, and Madara will not tell him the truth… he'll grow to resent me and finally forgive me… yes, he will forgive me… forgive me… something I didn't even do… I never forgave myself… yes, I never did…"

In a minute he seemed to fall out of his reverie and looked at the girl, who was stunned because of his baby talk to himself.

"Hm?"

"Haaaaah? Oh, you're talking to me?"

"Who could I be talking to?"

"Haaaaaah… … …"

"Shall we go? I need to introduce you to the other members of Akatsuki."

"Yeaaaaaah…"

**Okay, so I guess the idea was good (madin456 gave it to me! Thx a lot =D) but I'm not very happy of how I got it here. So review and tell me what you think!**


	8. Nagato

Hobbies

**I don't own Naruto nor Monopoly. And probably this one is the most inspired one till now, because it kinda fits Nagato.**

Tenten was walking freely around the base, not meeting anyone. Suddenly, she heard voices coming from a door (one of the many doors in that base):

"Come on, Konan, just one game!"

"No, Nagato! I don't want to play that game that profanities paper! I mean, who'd ever think of interchanging paper as money?"

"You never mind real money!"

"It's not only paper, there's something else in their structure. I disagree with simple paper used like this!"

"Okay, we can play the variant with the card. Will you?"

"Nooooooo!" the woman voice said and Tenten heard footsteps coming towards the door. She pretended to be walking and not listening when Konan exited and saw her.

"Oh, hi, Tenten-chan… I didn't know this was the week when you visited us."

"Hello, Konan-sama. And yes, this is that week."

"Heh, great. Why don't you go there and see what Pein likes to do in his spare time?" she said and pushed poor Tenten inside the room she had just left and locked her there.

Much to her surprise, the kunoichi saw the Leader in front of a Monopoly game board, holding up some fake money and looking at her.

"Ummmm… hello, Leader-sama?" the girl said as a try to make him do more than just sit and stare.

"Ah… works too! Will you play a Monopoly game with me? I mean, if Konan doesn't want to I bet you want."

"I'm…"

"Play or know true pain!"

"I'll play!" Tenten said quickly and collapsed to the ground on the other side of the game board.

"'Kay!" Pein said and then enthusiastically started counting the money.

**A few hours later:**

"No! Don't even dare buy that! I'm a god! I own every possible world, and I own the world of Monopoly! SHINRA TENSEI!"

Everything in the room was blown out, including the furniture, the door, a helpless Tenten and the whole Monopoly game. Even a wall got disintegrated and everything in the room fell out through the hole made. Tenten landed on the remaining of a chair, with a trickle of blood coming out of her temple. She looked up dizzily and saw Itachi looking down at her. He helped her up and then he looked at Nagato who was now regretting everything.

"I see you found out about our dear Leader's hobby."

"And I'm not sure I wanna see more of your hobbies here in Akatsuki. I mean, only one member has already destroyed half of the base. I'm afraid for my own sake!"

"Don't worry… it'll only get worse…"

**Not very happy with this chappy. Lol, it rhymes! Happy-chappy! I should make another Sasuke-like song with happy-chappy!**

**Getting off the track again. Okay, so…review!**


	9. Zetsu, Kisame, Hidan, Konan and Deidara

Hobbies

**Long time no update… Srry, I've been busy with Cursed… This chappy was inspired by the old Nightwish in concert. Plus, I was too lazy to do separate chappies for each of them…=D**

**I don't own Naruto. Song writing skills shine again! It's a remake of Alice Cooper's old Poison…**

**9. Konan, Kisame, Deidara, Hidan& Zetsu**

After Pein came Konan, on Tenten's list. She went to the woman's room to hear incredibly loud rock music coming from inside the room.

She knocked timidly, and then entered the room. And remained shocked at the sight of the rock band.

Konan was holding the microphone with her hair untied, dressed in a black dress very metal-rock looking. Deidara and Hidan were holding each a guitar, though Hidan's looked more bass-like. Zetsu was madly drumming near the farthest wall, with closed eyes and an open-mouthed grin on his face. And Kisame was wearing a 'Save the whales' T-shirt while playing the keyboard.

"Hey, Tenten-chan. What are you doing here?" Konan asked, making a sign to the guys to stop playing their instruments. They all complied except for Zetsu, who kept bashing those drums like it was the last thing he ever did. He eventually stopped when he realized he was the only one singing.

An awkward pause passed before Tenten spoke:"I wanted to see what you're doing in your spare time… I'll depart if I disturb you…" she said backing off towards the door.

"Nah, it's okay… we need feedback, because we argue a lot about how good the verses are, un…" Deidara said, smiling at the girl.

"So… let's perform our best one!" Zetsu said and started killing the drums again.

"Your unnecessary death

Your body, like ice

A kunai that could kill

Gave me pain seeing your thrill

I want to love you but I you're cold dead

I want to kill Hanzo but my senses tell me I can't

I want to kiss you but I want it too much

I want to taste you but your lips are not mine anymore

Your memory is poison running through my veins

You're poison, I don't want to break these chains

Your mouth, so hot

Your death, I'm caught

Your skin, so wet

From the Ame's cold rain…

I hear you calling and it's needles and pins

You were hurt just to hear me screaming your name

I wanna touch you but you can't feel it anymore

I want to kiss you but your lips are not mine anymore

Your memory is poison running through my veins

You're poison, I don't want to break these chains

Poison

A kunai that could kill

Gave me pain seeing your thrill

I want to love you but I you're cold dead

I want to kill Hanzo but my senses tell me I can't

I want to kiss you but I want it too much

I want to taste you but your lips are not mine anymore

Your memory is poison running through my veins

You're poison, I don't want to break these chains

Poison

I want to love you but you're cold dead

I want to kill Hanzo but my senses tell me I can't

I want to kiss you but I want it too much

I want to taste you but your lips are not mine anymore

Your memory is poison running through my veins

I don't want to break these chains

Poison, oh no

Runnin' deep inside my veins,

Burnin' deep inside my veins

It's poison

I don't wanna break these chains

Poison!"

"OMFG! You have no copyright!" Tenten yelled pointing with an accusing finger towards them.

"Why the fuck did we ask her to appreciate us? Let's sacrifice her to Jashin-sama!"

"Or explode her, un!"

"Or suffocate her with paper…"

"Or eat her… she looks tasty…"

"Or feed her to my sharks…"

I've just realized I need to see… Tobi! Gotta go! The power of youth!" Tenten said, and all five members of the band started chasing her down. Again.

**No ideas for Tobi… and I'm not very happy with this chappy, but I needed to update it… so… anyone, ideas?**


End file.
